Tag Archives: life

The Importance of Showing Gratitude

2 Jun

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I was out to lunch with coworkers last week, and everyone was telling funny work-related stories. Someone told one about how her boss had left his work bag on the train, and when they by some miracle found it- she sent a dozen roses to the person who did. I couldn’t help but be proud that this was my coworker, but also ashamed at myself at the same time. I would never have thought to do this! Then I started thinking, about how many people that have helped me, and in return I had only given them a quick “thank you.”

This incident wasn’t the first time I had thought about how my gratitude meter at work (and outside of work) needed a boost. Since I’ve started working at my new job two weeks ago, I’ve learned many many things, but the biggest lesson I’ve learned is the importance of encouraging and thanking the people you work with. We have this online tool, where you send “love” to anyone who deserves it- whether that is going out of their way to help you with something, making improvements, or doing a great job on a project. You might think this sounds odd, but really what it is- is taking one step further than a quick “thank you” to show people how appreciative you are- which sadly, we don’t often do. In fact the word “thank you” has become so common place that it has about the same weight as “sorry”. It’s better than saying nothing, but the word alone isn’t enough when people go out of their way to be a great friend, family member or coworker.

If you take 5 minutes each day- literally just 5 minutes, and send a thank you email or text or flowers or card basically any form of thank you to anyone that helps you, it will drastically improve relationships. Honestly, when was the last time you thanked the IT guy or girl at your work for helping fix your computer, your Dad for reminding you to get an oil change on your car, your coworker for getting you lunch, or your friends for just being awesome? Chances are, (if you are like me) it’s been awhile. And it doesn’t have to be in written form- picking up an extra coffee for your coworker in the morning, or grabbing a reeses for your friend if they are having a bad day- are all easy ways of showing gratitude. Is this the same as kissing as*? Nope unless you are doing it with expectations of something in return which shouldn’t be the case. All you need in return, is knowing that you are showing people what it means to be a good coworker, or friend and they’ll pass that on to someone else who needs it.

As Kennedy said, “As we express our gratitude, we must never forget that the highest appreciation is not to utter words, but to live by them.”

Change: a.To cause to be different b.To transfer from (one conveyance) to another c.To become different or undergo alteration

1 Jun

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If there is one thing in life that is certain it is that change is inevitable.

Change comes in many forms, today will change into tomorrow, your age will change each year, you will change you mind, you will change where you live, you will change who you love, the things that matter most in the world to you will change.

Everyone deals with change in their own way, some embrace it and seek it out, while others reject it and do absolutely everything they can to avoid dealing with it.  So what makes change so hard and why is it something that causes constant fear and stress? Change can mean taking a risk and often not knowing what exactly is going to happen next. Change comes in many shapes in sizes from something as significant as getting a new President of the United States to deciding to change your morning routine.

As a society we often overlook the fact that we have much more control over change than we sometimes realize. It is too easy to just blame things in life on change and act as though we had no say over them, when more often than not we do.

The most important characteristic of change lies in the beauty of it’s power. Over the past few years the world has witnessed the impact that Gen Y has made in politics, social issues and becoming a prominent and respected part of the business world. With this being said our generation has been given more opportunity than any before us, we have access to so much information instantaneously through the Internet and accessibility to millions of people through social media.

Slowly becoming an adult gives us the freedom to decide and figure out who we are and where we fit in this world. Although it is a confusing time it is so exciting because we can decide what we want to do with our free time what we dedicate ourselves to, and instead of just being a student or a employee we have the choice to become ambassadors of change. I know this many sound a bit intimidating but it doesn’t mean single-handed saving the world but it does mean becoming proactive in your own way.

It is easy to get caught up in the every day routine of life and forget about everything going on outside our personal world. Here and now is the time to ask ourselves what have we done for others? What positive change have we contributed to? Maybe making a change is as simple as getting a compost bin to help eliminate trash or taking an even better step and setting aside a couple hours a week to an non-profit that you believe in and helping them out.

Change is an overwhelming word but when we think of it in terms of the small every day changes we can make and encourage others to make it seems a lot less scary. I know everyone always makes the point that if everyone made small changes in would in fact make a HUGE difference but it is the truth and it is now about taking matters into your own hands.

The founders of CoolPeopleCare recently published a book called New Day Revolution discussing the importance of taking even one minute our our busy days to make a conscious effort to do something proactive. Highlighting the importance of making an impact where we are with what we’ve got. The past month Life Without Pants has been asking bloggers to share their thoughts on change so check out their site for all the thought provoking posts and different approaches others take dealing with change.

Do the world a favor and ask yourself today, what am I doing to instill positive change in the world?

And as my favorite all time quote states above, be the change you wish to see in the world!

Guest Post: Taking the First Steps in Your Adult Shoes

27 May

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Graduating from college is a huge step in life. The question changes from what do you want to be when you grow up to  a more realistic one- now what? The first steps you take after college are the start to your adult life. I started thinking about this in light of a friend deciding to move back home.
My friend Matt went to college in Oregon and moved to San Diego upon graduating last summer- to live with his best friend and start a new life. He got a job as a waiter to pay the bills while he looked for a job. He felt like he didn’t fit in here and talked about it often. He was constantly reminiscing about the college days and how he was the “big man on campus.” After less than a year, Matt has decided to move back home. I have mixed feelings about his move, because he did give it a shot, but I don’t think he was open minded enough.

Here’s a few pearls of wisdom for the new grad out there:

1. KEEP AN OPEN MIND: Be ready for new experiences and new challenges. Be ready to LEARN. Managing my own money and supporting myself financially was something I had to adjust to.

2. EXPECT TO BE DISAPPOINTED: You will be let down at some point, that’s life so just be ready. You might not get the first job you interview for. You may not get the salary you expected. All I’m saying is be realistic. Especially in this economy the game is totally different.

3. CHANGE IS INEVITABLE: Even if you stay in the same city you attended college, your life will not be the same. Friends will leave and life will be different. There are no “mental health days” allowed at work like in college. You need to change your method of thinking and remember that you are being paid to be there and your company values your time so you should too.

4. TAKE RISKS: If not now, then when? Move somewhere new. Apply for a job you might be under qualified for. Travel and work somewhere exotic for a while. Go out and meet new people- NETWORK! This is probably the most valuable take away networking will do wonders for your career in the present and in the future.

5. TAKE YOUR OWN PATH: This is your time to be selfish. By that I mean, you need to make decisions for yourself  about where you will live, work and play. Don’t make your plans according to what your best friend or boyfriend/girlfriend is doing- you will be left thinking what if. Go with your gut and make sure that you are doing something that you are proud of and are in a place that you feel excited about going to work and being part of the company.

Starting off is both frightening and exciting and you will never get another first chance to decide what the first thing you will do after college is going to be so make it something great and do not be afraid of listening to your heart!

-Nicole LaVelle

Nicole LaVelle is a recent graduate from San Diego where she studied graphic design she has also studied in Florence Italy and she is now working as a Designer at a marketing company. You can see her work here www.nicolelavelle.com

Inspiring Words

9 May

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I just watched Michael J Fox’s special on happiness, and found his closing words very inspiring. Enjoy! (And be sure to watch it if you missed it)

“For everything this disease has taken, something of greater value has been given. Sometimes, it’s just a marker that points me in a new direction that I might otherwise not have traveled. So sure, it may be one step forward and two steps back, but after a time with Parkinson’s I’ve learned that what’s important is making that one step count. It’s evident in Tracy’s love and inexhaustible friendship, the toothless grip in Esma’s smilie, Aquinna’s grace, Schuyler’s grip, Sam’s intrepid curiosity. Since I’m not sure of which address to send my gratitude, I put it out there in everything I do. Its my ongoing journey and what I’ve discovered is that optimists are open to alternatives in the face of adversity- they deal with reality head on. That hope flourishes in groups and resonates when people are doing what they love and that happiness is contagious- you can give it out like newspapers and feel it in everything you do.”


What I’ve Learned Lately about Job Searching…

18 Mar

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First thing I’ve learned? It sucks.  I always dreamt of what I’d do on days off and how wonderful it would be- I’d go to a coffee shop, for a walk around the city, shopping, and maybe to a museum. Little did I know that when I actually had all the time off in the world I’d want nothing more than to be at my desk with a million coffee cups around me and papers piled to the ceiling. Every time someone says they’re jealous of all my free time I cringe a little inside, but then I realize I was once that person that held a day off in the same light as a chocolate milk fountain. Overall, job searching is a full time job that requires complete devotion and sacrifices. And just like with a job, you make some mistakes and learn valuable lessons along the way.

Here’s some valuable lessons I’ve learned recently about the job search that are worth sharing:

Make Monetary sacrifices: It can be very tempting to buy the Vegas ticket with your best friends, or go out for drinks and appetizers on a Saturday, but remind yourself that these are luxuries that  come with a paycheck.  It may upset you at first to miss out on some of these things, but remind yourself that your situation is temporary, and that saving the money for rent, utilities and groceries is much more important.

Be honest with your friends and family: Acting a little more frazzled than usual? Missing some gatherings you used to attend? If you let people know your situation, your good friends and family will understand and want to help you during this time. Not telling them and keeping your stress to yourself will cause strain in your relationships. And letting them know you are on the job search may turn up some exciting job opportunities!

Be patient: When I first started applying to jobs, my roommates looked at my like I was crazy when I asked them why I hadn’t heard back from anyone in a couple days- and rightfully so! With the overwhelming amount of people applying, it might take the employers longer than usual to get back to you. Stay patient and keep applying to other jobs that you are interested in.

Keep a record of the places you apply: You have to be ready at anytime for the employers to call you and ask you some questions about yourself. If you have a list of the places you apply, along with the version of the resume/cover letter you sent as well, you will be more than prepared when this happens. I recommend keeping a spreadsheet and appropriately labeling your documents to refer to later.

Keep your old routine: Applying to jobs is a 9-5 job. But along with a 9-5 job (if you are lucky) comes a lunch break and end point when you go home and relax with your friends and family. Make sure to take a break, walk around a bit, eat lunch and do the same routine you had when you were employed (exercise, read, write, and play). I have a rule with myself now that I don’t bring my computer into my room at night. If I do- I fall into the trap of job searching until the wee hours of the morning. Set a limit for yourself on the working, and keep doing the things you enjoy.

Don’t apply to anything and everything: When you first get laid off or quit, it can be tempting to apply to every job you see on job boards. However, doing this will only lead you to a job that you aren’t completely happy with and waste your time better spent applying to a job that you love. Take time to think what you really want to do and read the job description carefully to make sure you are are qualified and really interested in it.

Live By Example…

12 Mar

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“In bathrooms, boardrooms, buses, bagel shops, and everywhere else, we all need to imagine a little girl following us around, repeating everything we say and everything we do. Think about all of the things you want for yourself and your daughters, granddaughters, and girls everywhere- and teach them by living it yourself.”- Nell Merlino, In Stepping Out of the Line: Lessons for Women who Want it their way in life, love and work.

What We’re Mad About This Week

27 Feb

Airport Nuernberg/GERMANY Sometime to understand the meaning of something it is easier when you have a visual image of it. This is what the photographic dictionary is trying to accomplish. Through this project they are trying to define words through the literal, figurative, and personal meanings found in each photograph.

ring Etsy is an amazing site as I am sure many people are familiar with now. When I was perusing it the other day for some artwork I came across this simple feather ring that is made from brass and just thought it was really sweet. To  check out her other elegant vintage jewelry items go here.

In honor of International Women’s Day, CARE and powerfulnoiseNCM Fathom present A POWERFUL NOISE Live. On Thursday, March 5, more than 450 theatres will feature the acclaimed documentary, “A Powerful Noise,” transporting movie goers into the lives of women in Bosnia, Vietnam, and Mali.

moneyatwork1 Searchable database of how and where tax dollars are spent as a result of the American Recovery and Reinvestment Act.

What Dating and Interviewing Have in Common

19 Feb

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Let’s face it, interviews and dates have a lot in common. Whether you go on 1, 2 3 or 4 they’re all about getting to know the other person and seeing if you are the right fit for each other. Here’s ten questions I feel you should be prepared to answer for both: 

1. Why are you applying? (Why are you on the date?): When you go on the first date, both people usually try to get a sense of what the other person is there for. Do they just want to hookup? Meet a new friend? Have a long-term relationship? This is similar to a job interview when employers are looking to determine exactly why you are applying for the position. Are you looking for a short-term job, or in it for the long-haul? Either way, make sure that you are honest and clear about your reasoning- this is your chance to reassure them you are there for the right reasons!

2. Why are you/did you leave your last position/relationship?  This might not be something brought up on the first date, but either way both parties want to know it. Were you too needy? Was infidelity involved? Knowing this gives insight into the type of person they are looking for in the next relationship. Similarly, a job wants to know this as well- in fact this was the first question asked in my most recent interviews. If you are leaving because there was too much attention to detail required and multiple projects and deadlines, this might be a red-flag to them if this is what the new position requires. This question can be a deal breaker- you don’t want to give away too much information about yourself and talk poorly about your past relationships/job. You do want to give them just enough detail so that they know you left for the right reasons, and that the other party is missing out.

3. Are you applying other places? (dating other people?) Unless you’re on the Bachelor, no one wants to date someone that is dating a bunch of other people at the same time as you. There’s too many others out there that would be interested in dating only you. This question has also come up in every single one of my interviews to date. Some may advise to be honest, but I personally think your answer should always be no. You wouldn’t want to hire someone that applied to every open position on Craigslist, and either do they.

4. Tell us a little about yourself: When you answer this intro on a date or in a interview, always keep the answer short and sweet. Stick with where you went to school, where you live and current job. On a date you can be a little more creative, but no one likes a rambler.

5. What do you know about the person/company? I reference the Bachelor again here, but nothing made me cringe more than hearing one contestant spout off everything on his Myspace page. There is one word for that and the police like to call it stalking. If you are introduced from a mutual friend or family member it doesn’t hurt to know one or two things about them like a common friend or where they went to school- great conversation starter. With a job, you should have researched extensively. You don’t have to memorize their whole web site- anyone can do that. But you should read articles in the news (be sure they are credible sources) and info that proves you went above and beyond what is expected. They don’t want someone that read the “About us section” but they do want someone who has a deep understanding of the company.

6. What are your salary (lifestyle) requirements? I doubt anyone on a first date is going to ask what the other person makes. But I can guarantee that both people are trying to figure out what the other persons lifestyle requirements are. Are you someone that is high maintenance, likes everything bought for you and only settles for steak dinners? Or are you perfectly happy renting a movie and making dinner? Always be prepared to answer this in an interview as well. Look up the base amount for the job you are applying for and let them know you understand it is dependent on your experience and the job requirements. You don’t want to sound greedy, but you also don’t want to underestimate your worth and ask for less than they’d pay.

7. Do you have any questions for us? This the deal breaker for dates and interviews. The worst date you’ve been on probably goes like this: guy/girl talks about themselves for hours while you think of exit strategies and filing taxes. It shows they are more interested in themselves than you. In an interview, if you ask questions it shows you are paying attention. I wouldn’t even come with questions prepared, just listen attentively to what they say and ask them to expand on them in the end. One question I would recommend asking is, “What qualities are you looking for in someone to fill this position?”

8. What are your future goals? What was that? You want to be the world greatest Wii champion and live off of your spouse? Enter text from friend here, that needs my help in an undisclosed location immediately. Also, If your goals are completely off, say if you see yourself traveling the world in 10 years with no children and the other wants to be married with children, that is also a red-flag. Showing that you have ambition, passions and goals that are somewhat in common with the other person is a good sign. In an interview, they also want to know you have goals that are in line with the company’s. If you “have no idea where you want to be in ten years” or “see yourself working as a stewardess if you are applying for a finance job”, you probably won’t get the position. If you see yourself working at their company, let them know that! They’d love to hear it and it proves you would be dedicated to the company and position.

9. What experience do you have that may help at the current position/relationship? If you haven’t had any longterm relationships this may be a sign that you are not good at commitment. If you’ve never done research you may not be the best match for a marketing research position. Make sure to relate past experiences in the best way possible to the prospect. For example, ” I haven’t had any long-term relationships because I haven’t found the right person” or, ” I dont’ have experience in this specific program, but I am a fast learner and have taught myself how to use other complicated programs such as x.”

10. What are your strengths and weaknesses? In this situation my best advice is to “Avoid the cliche.” Any guy that says, ” I’m really romantic, love to take long walks on the beach and hand you the remote even when I’m watching football” clearly Googled “perfect lines to say at a date.” Similarly anyone that says “proactive, reliable and creative” can expect the interviewers to sigh in their heads of boredom. Instead, be honest about both and tailor them to the position you are applying for. Saying you can ” Effectively handle multiple projects and deadlines” at an administrative or project management position would be better than just saying “creative.” On both dates and interviews you want to get to know the other person first before you say your weakness. If you say ” I’m really messy” when they’ve announced several times they are obsessively clean may send the other person running. Saying ” I’m really bad at math” at a position that requires formulas and data entry might not be a great choice as well. No matter what you say, end on a positive with how you are working on it. After, you can reevaluate if you are the best fit for the position.

Internship and PR opportunity with MWW Group

2 Feb

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The MWW Group, an award winning public relations agency, is hosting an incredible opportunity for new students, graduates, or anyone who owns a business. With the recent inauguration of President Obama, there is no doubt that he will be expected to bring change within his first 100 days of Presidency. 

They are asking for written and verbal submissions, of 100 words or less, that answer the questions: “What change are you ready for in the first 100 days?” and “What can YOU do to bring about this change?” The winning entry, will receive 3 months of pro bono support worth $30,000 for your business, or a $5,000 internship at any of their ten offices to learn the necessary pr skills to implement the change described. 

I think this opportunity is pretty  awesome, because it not only gets people thinking about what they would like to see changed, but provides the tools for how to make that change happen! And in this economy, what better prize than an internship or free consulting with a top PR company? 

Click here to learn more about this opportunity and submit your entry before February 20th.

How To Relieve Stress At Work

29 Jan

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I was on a meeting with my co-worker the other day, when he said to me ” Believe it or not, as the project manager  you should be more stressed out than anyone- stress is a good thing!” To which I replied in my head- “What? Since when is stress a good thing? If I am stressed out, doesn’t that mean I don’t have all the projects under control?”

I’ve always been a calm, quiet person, and when I’m stressed, I don’t typically run around flailing my arms, yelling obscenities and sweating from head to toe. My stress episodes usually involve getting even quieter, until I feel the tears coming and retreat to my car to scream and vent to my mom for an hour. Now that I think of it- sort of reminds me of my first day of Kindergarten. Anyways, because of this I’m pretty sure my Boss thinks he needs to do anything it takes to make me more visibly “stressed out,” but I refuse to give in. Here’s some tactics I’ve been using lately that have kept me from pulling a Scarface in Half Baked:

1. Take a break: whether it’s walk outside or reading the news online, taking your mind off of the stressful situation helps. I prefer walking outside and getting some fresh air- it’s an instant relief.

2. Think before you say anything: Under stress it can be easy to blurt out whatever is on your mind. Ten minutes later, telling your boss ” I did not get a degree in picking up sandwiches!” will not seem like the best idea.

3. Delegate: don’t be afraid to ask for help- trying to juggle all of the tasks yourself will make you more stressed and less productive.

4. Exercise: Honestly this is the best stress-reliever. Whether it’s going to the gym or taking a walk or run outside, it will clear your mind and blow off steam.

5. Clear your desk and desktop: As the saying goes, ” A cluttered desk is a cluttered mind.” When your desk and computer are in disarray and you’re constantly searching for lost papers and files, it can be even more stressful. Make a folder that says ” to file” on your desktop and put all of the scattered files in there for later organizing. And even if it takes sacrificing a lunch break, file all of your papers.

6. Only focus on one thing at once: Even if you have ten projects to do in an hour, take a breath and devote a little time to only thinking and working on one project. Be honest, and if you cannot accomplish everything let your boss and clients know ahead of time.

7. Get a little Rowdy after work: No I don’t mean have ten beers and punch in windows. Watch a sports game with friends, join a community sports league, go to a concert, even watch the Bachelor (guilty)- any situation where it’s sociably acceptable to scream and yell in public or at your tv.

8. Be realistic: If you have 5 arms and 2 brains skip this one, but if not realize that you are only one person and can do so much. Don’t stress yourself out by over-promising. Break things into smaller, reasonable tasks that can be accomplished.

9: Try relaxation techniques: Breath deeply and count to ten (or 100 depending on how stressful you are) and Transport yourself to a happier place where there are no 10 hour work days or micro-managing bosses. Try drinking a cup of peppermint or chamomile tea.

10.  My favorite mantra which I say over and over to myself when I’m stressed is a quote I heard from The Secret: “Life isn’t nearly as serious as my mind makes it out to be.” Realistically the world isn’t going to end if I send an email ten minutes late, or forget to send something to a client (once not 500 times mind you). Yes, it will have repercussions and both parties will be mad but my life and theirs will not be over over one slip up. We will persevere…

Now back to my cup of tea and happy place.

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